Getting over a relationship can be incredibly difficult. What can make the pain worse is if it was a toxic relationship: fighting, cheating, affairs, lies and deceit. The scars of such a relationship can leave an indelible mark on someone’s psyche and their view of the world. It is for this reason, and many others, that those who have become recently single should consider Steps to Happyness break-up therapy. It’s not as simple as just “moving on” and adjusting to the single life again. The end of a long-term relationship (married couples, long-term partners) takes time. Even shorter, more intense relationships can bring a similar level of pain, sadness and anxiety. So, if you think you are someone who needs break-up therapy to get over that one person, read on to find out some useful benefits.
Even the most painful ending of a relationship can precipitate quality personal growth. This all stems from meaningful reflection from a counselor or therapist. They know the right questions to ask and the best manner to phrase them. You won’t feel guilt, shame or inflated anger against your partner or your therapist. Instead, you’ll just converse and reflect on your relationship. You’ll focus on the moments where things started to change and why perhaps they did. You can learn from what happened and become a better, more balanced person because of it.
Break-up therapy can also help minimize those negative thoughts (like shame and guilt). If these thoughts are very severe, it could inhibit your ability to operate daily. Don’t let the negative self-talk consume your life. Reach out and speak with someone who can help you see reason, while augmenting your perspective of yourself, your previous relationship and the world.
Trade in loneliness for life goals
After the end of a meaningful relationship, it’s quite common for people to retreat into their shell. They can become lonely, depressed and detached from their friends and family. A lot of the time, this is because the person either feels some sense of guilt for their relationship ending or a feeling of inadequacy.
Getting effective break-up therapy can help trade in this sense of loneliness for new constructive life goals. Discuss with your counsellor about things in your life you are yet to achieve. Your priorities, values and goals are dynamic – they’ll change often. They may have even changed quite substantially throughout your relationship. Instead of wallowing in sadness, brainstorm ways you can achieve these goals and act on these values. Maybe you kept putting off getting a new job or starting a new hobby? Well, now is the time to do it!
Help you get back out there
Another great benefit of getting effective break-up therapy is that it can help you when meeting new potential relationship partners. Many people are left shy and introverted after a relationship ends. They lose faith in their personality and their confidence levels plummet. Speaking to a trained counselor can help you find the confidence you need to begin dating again.
However, it’s important to recognise that it’s not just about “filling the void” the person left. Your counselor will discuss in your break-up therapy how you can find people that will connect with you well. Take your time, you don’t have to start dating right away, nor do you need meaningless encounters, binge-eating or drinking (these won’t necessarily help you). It’s important to give yourself time to grow and learn who you are. Once you are ready, look for something meaningful.
At the end of the day, how you get over a relationship is your choice. However, if you are feeling incredibly lonely and vulnerable, reaching out to a counsellor for break-up therapy could be the best decision you make.